Hold on tightly, let go lightly
Inertia — Nº180
Part of life is this intensely inquisitive dance between attachment and release. The typical ebb and flow, pain and calm. We cling to the things we love; the worn-out jumper, tattered teddy bear, or the only photo left of a moment to remember—because it’s ours, dammit, and we’re not letting go. It’s a part of you, woven into our fabric, and to release it would be like losing a piece of yourself.
So, we cherish the people, the places, the problems. We shape the threads that build our lives to be as unique as they are. No matter how knotted or painful they end up. But instead of undoing and strengthening the weaving, we’d rather keep it fragile and delicate—but beautiful in our eyes. We hold fast, get defensive, and do everything possible to preserve it. But sometimes, despite what we try, change sweeps in, trying to pull that thread through our fingers.
An example could be old trauma that seeps into a new relationship. You may find your guard up or that you bite sharply when a particular topic arises. And no matter what, you refuse to shake and let go of the past. Or, you might be staying in a job that makes you miserable but shutting down the possibility of working on a career change.
So then we wrestle with this question: what do you do when holding on is more painful? Our instinct is to cling, fight, and defy anything threatening our sense of stability. But in the struggle, we ignore that it’s like clutching at thorns; the longer we grasp onto our messy struggles, the more blood we draw and harm done to us alone.
Hold on tightly, let go lightly. Cherish what you have and let go when the time comes. Yes—appreciate the beauty of devotion and honour the relationships and experiences that enriched your life. Hold on to them while they bring colour and depth to your story. But know that there comes a time when holding on too long turns into a burden that only leaves you sore, and the weight overshadows the joy you could have for the joy you once had.
It’s not about abandoning what you love; it’s about the natural release of acknowledging the need for fluidity and comfort within change. Understanding that it’s okay for things to shift, for relationships to evolve, for chapters to close. Closing out the over-intellectualisation and opening your eyes. It’s telling yourself that you are already free, that what makes you strong is not your death grip but your open palm.
We will wrap many memories in the softest folds and tuck them safely into the bottom of our bag. But life has its way of throwing curveballs. When the time comes to release that past, you can do so gently: open your palm and let bad memories drift away. Their absence doesn’t diminish the entire experience; it just tells you that the moment is yours, you deserve to feel good about every single day, and you deserve life to feel slow, sweet, calm, and unburdened.