Self-Mastery Nº59
Show, Don't Tell
What do great storytellers and goal-setters have in common?
Great storytellers excel at one thing: they show you everything and tell you nothing. They have a special ability to show you the glint of light on the broken glass rather than tell you the moon is shining.
People who consistently achieve different goals are no different.
Many people don’t reach their goals simply because they spend too much time thinking—or talking—about them. I used to do the same. It happens to almost everyone, really. The feeling can be so rewarding that you often feel you’ve accomplished something before you’ve begun.
In the past, I loved coming up with new, fancy goals. Goals that were sprinkled in glitter and sounded like something you’d want to sing down the street. But I never amounted to them. And I’d do it again and again. It felt intense, sweet, rewarding—initially—but it never made me happy over time.
My best friend is the complete opposite. He tells you something he wants to do, and the next time you hear about it, it’s already done and dusted or strongly underway. Whether it was getting a job or completing a big personal challenge, I love this approach.
Great goal setting is synonymous with writing your ideas down and then throwing the paper away. The best way to tell someone about your goals is by showing them what you’ve already done. You should have nothing more to say other than what people can already see you making progress with.
So, don’t tell me you want to lose weight; show me your weight loss. Don’t tell me you want to be a better writer; show me what you’ve written. Don’t tell me you want to be happy; show me that you’re doing what you want to do and being who you want to be.
Show everyone, tell no one.
What I’ve Learned This Week
4 Loops That Cause Creative Struggle
Look at the boxes below. See a theme? They are mostly the same, though different people find themselves in different loops. We’ve all spent doing things that aren’t useful for our growth, but to get out of your loop: embrace commitment and experimentation. Believe in your ability to figure things out. “Don’t justify your bullshit”. Create more than you curate. What you know/learn is only as useful as its application in your life.
The Two Types of People
Some people focus on what they have while others focus on what they lack. If you choose to be the second group—and I stress that it is a choice—you’ll be consistently miserable, regardless of what you achieve.
Doing is Overestimated. Quitting is Underestimated.
While it is easier than ever to try again after failing—and I thoroughly endorse it—quitting the wrong things (once you know what is truly unnecessary) offers far more value to you than doing the right things. “We often focus on trying to be brilliant, yet many great people get far more mileage out of avoiding making stupid mistakes”.
What’s on My Mind
The easiest way for you to take care of the world is by taking care of yourself. If we all do that, beautiful things can happen.
Explore
Brain Food
“Today’s world is full of sensationalist media and ideas. With our health, you wouldn’t be the only one who’s been constantly confused with what the right and wrong practices are. One week, fat is bad. The following week, fat is good. Some people say avoid carbs to lose weight; others say it’s essential. One “expert” tells you only need six hours of sleep every night; another says you must get nine.”
→ These 9 Pillars Will Boost Your Health, Immunity and Longevity
“Low back pain is naturally structural or mechanical. And there is always a cause. As Dr Stuart McGill would say, there is no such thing as non-specific back pain. Specific motions, postures and loads often worsen the pain, and specific motions, postures, and loads can also relieve it.”
→ How to Stop Back Pain from Dominating Your World
Timeless Quote
“Advice is abundant, execution is scarce.”
— Visualise Value
My Favourite Things This Week
Tweet — A life-changing question for us all by James Clear.
Book — I think I’m halfway through Show Your Work now. It’s a great book so far, the type of book I’d gift to any close friend of mine.
Podcast — Logan Paul and KSI came together in what’ll probably be one of the biggest podcast shows for a long time. This gives great insight into what it’s like to build something special on the internet.
A Question For You
What are you avoiding?
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Until next week!
Jelani
PS: I finally got my first official job doing what I love: writing. Outside of freelance copywriting, it gives me the freedom to write, learn something new, and provide a bit more security.